Mommy Moment

Hey again. Yeah, I recovered from my one whole day of babysitting darling, dimpled, diaper man. We all survived. Liz was anxious to be back to her little one. He was thrilled to find her in her bed where she belonged this morning and I was relieved to be able to hand the reins back to my gorgeous sister. Watching her mother her sweet toddler through his breakfast and morning mischiefs I felt overwhelmed with love for this amazing woman. She possesses a remarkable strength for it. She is physically strong, easily lugging his 30 + pounds all over the place. Her spirit is strong. She loves enthusiastically with kisses and smiles and hugs. Somehow she knows all the tricks for appeasing his demanding personality without spoiling him rotten. It leaves me wondering what sort of mother I was. Was I cheerful? Did my boys have the slightest idea how much I love them? Oh well, it's never too late. I can't hardly lift them a centimeter off the floor these days. They would just as soon spend the night away from me with a friend much less cry "Mama" when they think of me and realize I am not there. Most of the time I get the rolling eyes if I want to "talk" about anything too serious. But...every night they want me to tuck them in and kiss them. I still feel that tender, eternal connection that a mother has for her child and I know that their young souls need that. I hope they always will. I know I will.

As a finale note, can I confess that at long last, after nearly 10 years, I am grateful I don't have a uterus.

Whew!

He's in bed. Sound asleep as far as I can tell.  

Will someone please tell me how anyone survives small children? How do you clean your teeth, make meals, keep up with laundry, fulfill church callings, have friends, read the sriptures, grocery shop, make your bed, work outside the home, volunteer in the schools and community, sleep and keep your marraige alive through the hours and hours that demanding little ones are awake?!! In the last couple of hours I have managed to feed him, put the dishes away, feed him some more, do (or should I say, help baby do) sommersaults, follow him around the porch while he pulled rocks out of the owner's potted plants, play with him in an empty tub, help him play in the kitchen sink, get him a drink or two, feed him some more, change his diaper, change his clothes, read him a story, sing him songs, put warm pants on him for his nap, put him in his crib, take him out into the kitchen to see if he needs a drink (nope, just wanted out) and finally settle him (or should I say quietly leave him screaming) in his little bed for a nap. Whew! Just about 8 more hours till Mama gets home, but who's counting?!!

Been Busy!!

It's been a wonderful time entertaining my sister Liz and her little Bennett.  We have been to the Ginger Factory for a rainy day of treats, train ride and a short themed boat ride.  Then we made it out to  Wellington Point just in time for an unbelieveable gorgeous sky.  Afterwards we went out for a real Aussie Burger (just throw on a slice of beetroot, an egg, and a big piece of middle rasher(bacon).  There was a lovely morning of park time where Liz and Bennett battled with sticks and  rode the swing.  Our life is better than ever, filled with the joy of baby talk and raisens and sippy cups.

I'm Getting Old

I notice my jowels (sp?) now.  They're beginning to sag, just like Grandma Hooten's did.  She was a beautiful woman but she did have heavy, baggy cheeks.  I love her.  I don't like my stage 2 jowels.  My  mom doesn't have them, by the way.  Don't ask me why I get them.

Gray hair is popping out of my head in very obvious places.  My little sister, Liz, used to pick them out "back in the day", just 10 years ago.  She would rummage around, find one and "plunk," it was out.  We would laugh, examine it and toss it aside.  Just a novelty, a silly distraction, sisterly bonding.  No big deal.  Now they're invasive.  I can see them clearly in recent pictures of me. 

My mother in law bought me a magnified mirror.  It's beautiful.  She has one and I had never considered asking for one like it, until last year.  I found myself borrowing hers to hunt down and remove the unlady like black hairs growing from my chin.  That mirror is incredible for that but it's been alarming to see my skin up that close.  I won't go into detail.  It's just too, well, yucky.  (I am trying to stay in denial as to the aging of my skin at this point).

There's more.  Today I realized that I am pushing pills on my  husband.  I give him one for his prostate (why take a chance?!), a multi-vitamin (the best I could buy), 2 vitamin C, and one called Gastro Health.  That one's tricky because you have to take it 30 min before you eat.  The vitamin is supposed to be taken with a meal.  Most of the time I can get most of it into him.  Today he reminded me that he's only humoring me.  I teased, "I gotta take good care of my man!"  As I walked back upstairs with his empty pill cup I knew my age.  

I know it.  I embrace it.  It's what I've wanted all along and I am getting it!!  Yeah!!!!

Worth the Wait

Straddy Sunrise

 Monday, pre-dawn, I walked out to the beach in the dark and sat up on the dune overlooking a huge ocean overhung by an enormous sky. 

 At first, it was stars and the sound of waves rushing and the invigorating, cool breeze off the water.  I wondered if I should go back for a jacket but surrendered the notion completely as the scene began to change. 

I began to sense motion in the black sea. Light appeared in the horizon.  Clouds took on color and form.  Moment by moment our gigantic, rising sun brought me, as it does quite simply every day, a beautiful new morning.

I walked down the beach overwhelmed to be alone with all of that beauty.  I thought about life, (I do that a lot.  Comes with the gray hair!))  how light changes the way we see things.  The more light became available the more glorious my setting became.  Absolutely nothing was needed other than that availability of life giving sunshine to transfom my entire world.  

And then there was nothing.  Quiet nothing time.  Almost boring really.  Without a hand to hold or an arm to snuggle me the grandeur of it waned.  I turned back, picked up my pace (and a black shoe, a child's sandal, and a plastic bottle) and went back to my family.